It is good to be back to this series after we took a break to address the nagging issue of child sexual abuse. The sad fact is that it has gotten to a state where every parent needs to structure their home in such a way that it is difficult for a child to be molested because there was another case that was brought to my table last week where a 2 years 8 months old boy tried having sex with his mother. As weird as that may have sounded to you but that was the shocking reality because the house girl has been having sex with the boy for several months without anyone’s knowledge. My strong appeal to everyone is for you to closely monitor your kids as well as implement basic sexuality education in your home.
We have examined a couple of principles that can help every leader live above their sex battles, but my biggest fear is that if we don’t checkmate the rate at which kids are being molested, sex would have become a language by the time they become future leaders and some may not even make it to that future because of stolen childhood.
One other principle that can assist any leader is the principle of sound mind. The Bible states that God has not given us the spirit of fear but of power, love and sound mind. Sound mind is critical at all times when it comes to your belief systems because the moment what you believe about sex is wrong, there is no way your sex life can be right.
What is your definition of sex? And the ladies around you, including their body and other reproductive parts. The general assumption all over the world is that a leader has got everything in place with respect to their thought pattern. Leaders listen to people a lot in counseling and sometimes what you hear is capable of affecting your unconscious state and that is why you can’t take chances with the state of your mind. A father once counseled the son to ‘Guard your mind with all diligence for out of it flows the issues of life’. We see things the way we are not the way things are, and once your definition is faulty, your use of that thing or concept would also be faulty.
There is a level you get to as a leader that the society would hold you up to a higher moral standard irrespective of your religious belief. What is sex to you as a leader? Sometimes we get so busy trying to save others without knowing that our belief systems have changed unconsciously.
Too many leaders see illicit sex as a secret that may never be revealed while others see it as something everyone else does. Some leaders see it as every man’s battle, but the sound-minded ones know that the difference between your wife’s body and the other woman out there is the shame that comes with it when your secret is exposed.
Sound-minded leaders know that sex is not just fun or a physical exercise. They know that sex is a covenant exchange of life, love and pleasure between the man and the woman in marriage for the purpose of unity, procreation and expression of marital love.
They are sound-minded enough to know that there are two types of STIs (sexually transmitted infections and spiritually transmitted infections) and they know quite alright that there is no condom that can protect their memory from illicit sex, so they don’t even go close to it. They have clarity about the fact that the male’s semen contains white blood cells and that the life of any flesh is in the blood, so they understand that sex is a transaction that involves a deposit as well as withdrawal.
What is sex to you as a leader?
True leaders are sound-minded enough to know that the body you use for sex in marriage is a legal body while outside of wedlock is a stolen body. They have clarity about the fact that the only body that can’t lead to any form of scandal is your wife’s body and they are sane enough to know that the effect of sex in marriage is good news while out of marriage is bad news. How sound is your mind?
Every sane leader know that every illicit sex is a transaction and negation or trade by barter where you trade your dignity for her body and your honour for her breast; you trade your peace of mind for sex scandal and your glory for pleasure.
How sound is your mind?.
To be continued